Getting involved in your in-law's internal family dynamic issues = bad idea. I'm just sayin'. Let your partner deal with them - they are his/her family, and thus his/her problem and you will never understand them like he/she does.
Another hint: if you find yourself starting to feel a little smug about the level of dysfunction your partner's family is currently exhibiting, just remember that time your brother punched out your dad's windshield.
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I used to think my family was way more screwed up than my husband's, but now that I know them I'm setting aside a little therapy fund for the kid, because given her genes, she'll need it.
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